#101 – A Compassionate Conversation on the IVF Ruling out of Alabama

March 1, 2024


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I'm Heather — helping women see that through Christ, our mess leads to our holiness.

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Christians weren’t ready for this conversation on IVF ya’ll, we weren’t.

You know what wasn’t ready and what really needs refined? Our compassion.

The desire for children is GOOD, holy, & right. Just like the desire for sex is good, holy, and right.

That doesn’t mean we should achieve that end by any means necessary & that’s a hard pill to swallow.

It’s even harder when people are yelling it at you on the internet… while you’re carring an insanely heavy cross of infertilty that leaves you feeling alone, broken, & sad. Sometimes feelings that you are forgotten by God, that your prayers aren’t heard or that your good, holy desires don’t matter to God or the world.

We could really do better at being Christians & calling people higher instead of just calling them out.

If you carry the cross of infertility, if you have a child as a product of fertility methods like IVF your child is loved, you are loved, so so deeply loved by God and the body of Christ.

I am sorry for the hurt pain that you carry. And I am sorry for the lack of compassion my fellow Christians have had in the past few days regarding such a deeply painful topic.

Just like compassion is lost when the pro-abortionist scream “my body my choice” to the humans out there who were conceived in less than ideal situations – you’re message to them is their life doesn’t matter. Their life matters.

As does the life of the woman in the situation that has brought her to the choice of whether or not to have an abortion.

Her life and her cross matters to the Body of Christ.

In the case of IVF we need to be VERY careful not to diminish the hurt, pain and the holy cross that couples who suffer from any form of infertility bare. When we scream the statistics and the definitions of when life begins we’re trying to put a bandaid on a horrible gaping wound. I don’t think it’s helping lead anyone to Christ.

Their cross matters immensely to the body of Christ.

There is a compassionate way to fraternally correct people you know in REAL life, to love them deeply and show them that any means to a good end don’t make all the means good. That life is lost when you choose methods like IVF – whether its frozen, discarded, “reduced”, etc but ya’ll – standing on a soap box and screaming that at HURT people trying to do everything in their power to become parents… which is a good, HOLY desire.. that ain’t it.

Evangelize on the internet yes but I don’t know many people who had their hearts and minds changed by some stranger yelling at them on social media… hearts and minds are changed through personal nurturing, personal love and Christ.

Go out and love the people around you. Be their Simon, help them carry their cross to Calvary.

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The Holy Hot Mess podcast is where we navigate the twists and turns of life as Catholic Christian women through candid conversations, laughter, and insightful interviews. Join your host, Heather, as she dive deep into the messy and beautiful journey of faith, healing, and growth.

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